Jumping out of my skin!

I got a super yummy Frappe from McDonald's today cause i needed a little pick me up after leaving work today, and that didn't do anything for me. What can you think of that worked for me? It was going into the NICU today!

I left work early due to not having enough to do and I wanted to leave and see my baby girl,so after looking a little pouty i was told OK :) I got there early and Dr.Martin saw me in the waiting room and let me in a 1/2hour early. I asked if we were still looking at mid August for Delilah to come home, and she said nope probably the end of July!

Delilah is doing AMAZING still! lol They lowered her oxygen to 1/4 today and upped her food to 24ml. She was doing really well while i held her, but towards the end of her feeding she got a little blah and I had to put her back in her "condo" usually the 1st day or two after changing her oxygen she gets a little wonky just trying to remember what she's suppose to do. But once in her bed she was perfect.

so I think that's all there is for today, and since i am ready to fall asleep sitting here I'll leave it at that.

Hugs and Love :)

Bottle and kangaroo time

What a fantastic day! I had a great workout with a very positive and motivated friend of mine, she helps make the workouts fun and to where I stick with them. Had a good day at work, and when I called the NICU today at 12:30 I found out Delilah got her 1^st bottle!!!!!!!!!!!

2lbs 10.5oz 7 weeks 6days

I was so excited I wrote on a piece of paper to show my co-workers while I still talked to the nurse and they started cheering for her! I was sad I wasn’t there for it but it is what it is, so me being the dork I am I started crying from being so happy and being sad I wasn’t there. She has amazing nurses who I love so much (not in a creepy way) they have done so much for us and been there for so much I just don’t know how to thank them for being them.

As I kangarooed Delilah (where she is stuffed in my shirt, skin on skin) I kept feeling this little sucking feeling on my chest, and hearing kissing sounds lol and it was her acting like I could feed her! I guess she LOVED the bottle. When I was leaving she was going to town on her pacifier again.

Kangaroo time with Delilah

loving the pacifier

This little girl amazes me and I know I said it so many times before but I mean really, come on! She shouldn’t be doing a lot of the thing’s she’s doing and she is! AHHHHAHAHAH I am so excited!

Ok ill stop bouncing off the walls on here time to get ready for bed and another day tomorrow.

Hugs and love

Moving on up

My 1^st week back to work was good, I started working out again and that has helped a lot kind of stinks getting up at 4am but it is so well worth it. We had  a great weekend, we celebrated on of my good friends birthday parties here at my house with a fire and cupcakes.

all clean and snuggled after the 1st bath mommy gave her.

Delilah is doing amazing still she’s such a tough little cookie, She is now 2lbs 8oz she eats 22ml every 3 hours, and she is on ¾ liter of oxygen. Dr.Martin said she might take her down to ¼ tomorrow. She getting close to a regular crib and got a new isolate today. I also gave her, her 1^st bath, which was fun. It’s been awhile since I gave a baby that small a bath and had to be reminded thanks to Michelle our nurse.

the new bed lol :)

The girls Auntie B (Kris) came up to meet Delilah today, which was really nice, I love when people come see her. I was also informed we have many people following our story and people are asking for updates lol it’s so weird to me that so many people care about us. It’s nice, just weird at the same time.

Snuggle time with mommy

Fun story yesterday when I called to check on Delilah, Michelle had informed me that our silly little had taken out her canula (I have no idea how she did it with how they tape it on her) and was chewing on it. She was going to town on her canula like she could get food out of it lol so maybe they will try a bottle in a week or so. So far she is just getting the feeding tube.

I cant wait for everyone to meet her, once she’s home and we are moved and settled in we will be having a come meet Delilah Diaper shower. If you would like to share this blog with anyone you are always more then welcome too, the more prayers we can get the better.

I’m so excited to when my baby is home and with her family. But right now she is with her family in the NICU and they are amazing people who we love so much. I hope they know how much they mean to us.

Hugs and love

Veronica

eat, breath, poop and grow

So the reason I haven’t posted a blog in awhile is nothing has really changed, Delilah is 1020 grams, which is 2.4lbs! She is at 1-liter oxygen and getting 20ml’s of food an hour so about ½ ounce.

Monday I went back to work, it was nice to be back and see everyone again plus I know I have 6 weeks to look forward to when Delilah comes home. So my mom baby-sits and on certain days Amanda watches Aria for an hour so mom can go to work. Yesterday mom was here all day so I got to go see Delilah and after 3 poopy diapers in a row (yes she filled them that fast) I got to hold her! I got 2 ½ hours of snuggles from my little girl, she was smiling and giggled at one point, I thought she was getting ready to cry but she fooled me hehe.

So tonight it’s more of just let her grow and eat, she’s doing so well! I am amazed at my littlest princess.

Hugs and love

I know.........................

I know I am impatient,

I know I am whiny,

I know I am a pain in the ass,

I know I am emotional,

I know thing’s are rough right now,

I know Delilah is doing good,

I know I am worried everyday,

I know I am ready to be back to work,

I know I want to be a stay at home mom,

I know I sound like I am complaining.

I am impatient and wish I could change that but I am like everybody, I want instant gratification. I am whiny cause I am me hehe! I am a pain in the ass cause I want everything and I want it now (hello impatient) I am emotional cause I am kind of stressed the hell out. Things are rough cause my baby is in the hospital and not in my belly getting big and letting me have a normal pregnancy. Delilah is doing amazing considering how small she is and how sick she was. I worry everyday cause I am a mom. I’m ready to be back at work so time goes by faster. I want to be a stay at home mom and enjoy my girls. And I know it sounds like I am complaining cause I am telling you how I feel and why.

There are a lot of thing’s I know but some it take me longer to accept. Delilah had to go back to the high flow canula and is up at 2 liters, Dr.Martin and all her nurses have told me that this is ok. It is not a set back.  But to me it feels like one and it scares the hell out of me!

They had to take her down to 10ml of food due to too much air in her little belly the other day, today she went up to 12ml and if she handles that ok they will go back up to 14ml around midnight.

When I called this morning Michelle told me Delilah had 3 of her events (not breathing) last night, which can and more then likely is due to getting to comfy and forgetting to breathe. This is normal for preemies and a hard thing for me to deal with, they say it’s nothing and such a minor thing she’s doing. To me it a huge deal but we also didn’t have to deal with these problems with Aria. Also she has no BIG problems so these problems seem huge to me.

This afternoon she was doing good and just sleeping, now it’s time to make my nightly call and make sure she’s doing ok before I go to bed. I can’t wait tell she is home, I know we have along way to go still and I need as many prayers as any of you are willing to give. Delilah’s lungs still need to develop and well all her little organs need to mature more and she needs to keep gaining weight.

Just called Angela and she said Delilah is doing great now, when she first got there tonight she was floating (little events is the best way to say it) a little bit and when she looked she was at 21% so she turned her back up to 28% and she has been doing perfect. Just praying she starts to handle it all soon and hoping I start to have patients even sooner.

Oh we also gave everybody permission to buy cloths for Delilah LOL yes we asked people not to buy stuff for a while since she was so sick when she was born. So now we gave people the go ahead but NO preemie cloths allowed, once she comes home she will probably be over 5lbs.

Hugs and Love.

P.s I wonder is any of our nurses in the NICU ever read these and think I’m bat shit crazy?

Delilah in her hat made by Tina @ Lovebug's crafty creation (here's her facebook page)

http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/lovebugscraftycreations?sk=wall

She was contacted by a friend of mine Tina, and Tina at lovebug's sent Delilah some cloths I can't wait for to wear. She has to be about 3-3 1/2 lbs before we can start putting cloths on her but once we can I will post pictures ASAP :) they are so cute!

and here is Delilah next to Daddy's hand to show how big she is a little over 2lbs at 6 weeks old.

Strangers and Angels

I am going to start this being very honest; I have had a super bad week! I have been irritable for no reason, a bit depressed and anxious all of this is happening because I have no idea! Maybe it’s because I can’t see Delilah everyday like I want to maybe it’s hormones maybe it’s the lunar alignment who the crap knows what it is. It’s just been BLAH! That’s the best I can say.

But Rick only had to work a half day today so since Michelle our nurse couldn’t get to the phone when I call this afternoon, I decided I was going to the hospital to see my little, and let Rick and Aria have a day together which was much needed for them. So THANK YOU Michelle! (Honestly thank you).

So once I got there my mood seemed better, I felt like I was running into the NICU and couldn’t stop talking and staring in amazement at how big Delilah looks today. She weighs 1.15lbs today she is 5 weeks and 4 days old today (which means almost 31 weeks gestation) and is 13 3/4inches tall. When Aria was born at 30 weeks she was 1.15lbs and 13 ½ inches long. It’s crazy how much Delilah is taking after Aria already lol, I think they will have to put a “seat belt” on her to keep her wiggly butt in one place.

Here's my "big" little today.

When I left I was feeling pretty good, more relaxed at least I had told our Doctor when Delilah comes home it has to be a Friday or a Saturday since ill be back to work she laughed at me. Once I was in the elevator there was a very nice older lady who was excited she stopped at the baby floor, she asked me if there was a new member of the family and I told her my daughter was in the NICU since May 5^th and had a very long stay still. She asked a few questions (nothing to personal) and asked my daughters name once I informed her of it she said she would add her to her prayers, and the sisters where she lived would too. A random stranger was the angel I needed, and who knows maybe she is an angel sent to me to help take some stress away.

Then came the call from work, I had asked if I could come back to work now then take the rest of my maternity time when Delilah came home. I asked this question like 2 weeks ago I figured I didn’t hear anything back so it was a no. Jeannie head of HR at my fantastic job informed me I can come back to work (once the doctor releases me I go on Thursday) now and take the rest of my leave once Delilah comes home! I am so freaking pumped I will get 6 weeks with my newest little and Aria. This also helps with all the appointments I know will have, preemies have quiet a few follow up appointments after they come home.

I still stand by the prayer I posted a few blog’s back we have been very blessed in the last few weeks, and YES I do believe it’s the faith I have and the prayers I say and all of you have been saying for us. Since I believe in this prayer so much I am going to share it again with all of you.

“There’s only so much I can control please place your hands on Delilah and help her to heal her little organs to where they are healthy and strong, please help her to continue to gain weight at a steady pace. Please give me clarity, help, and guidance, and the peace of mind to let the day unfold just like it is meant to. I know positive thing’s are on the way. I surrender!”

When I got home from the hospital I walk in to see Rick and Aria snuggled up on the couch and her dosing off which I wish I could have gotten a picture of but her little butt jumped up before I had a chance to get near the camera.

Hugs and love to you all

Delilah is turning into a redish head lol her dark hair is getting lighter like her big sister Aria's is :)

somedays..................

Holy moly, I just realized Aria turns 2 in a month (as of tomorrow) I think I need to get on the ball and plan a party! It’s going to be a crazy busy summer we have Aria’s 2^nd birthday 2 or 3 wedding’s moving the end of August (that means A LOT of packing) Delilah coming home, we’re both going to be working and our house warming come meet Delilah diaper shower once we’re settled and whatever family/friend get together there happen to be thrown in the mix.

Delilah is bouncing between 800 and 830 grams she doesn’t seem to want to go past 1.13lbs right now. So can you all please pray she continues to gain weight at a good pace. So far she’s just coasting nothing has really changed with her other then weight.

Aria started saying Delilah’s name today and it’s so freaking cute, it sounds like Nahnah I can’t wait to have both my girls in our house. It’s so hard only getting to see Delilah twice a week since Rick is working I have to wait for a babysitter (usually my mom on a day off) so I can go, plus only having one car sucks but we should be able to fix the transmission on the Suburban soon I hope. I’m worried people think I don’t care about my daughter since I can’t be there all the time. But that is so not the case, if I could be there everyday I would. If I could be there more the once a day I would but with gas prices only one trip is allowed.

Hugs and love………………..

Out the nose

I know I freak out to easy with the things going on with Delilah but it’s very hard to deal with some of the stuff they tell you is going on. I called this am to see if they got the cultures back so we know what the infection is, (which that hasn’t come back yet) but I was told Delilah had food coming out her nose and mouth. This has never happened with her before so it worries me a lot. She has a feeding tube into her mouth and she did not pull it out and yes that happens, again not with her though lol so I am waiting on rounds to get done so I can call back and see if anything has changed. She has her events a lot more towards the end of her feedings which is when the spitting up happened this morning.

Now Aria on the other hand that little crazy girl pulled her feeding tube out many times while in the NICU, and once she got home she would have formula coming out of her mouth and nose while she slept. Only for me though NEVER for Rick which was annoying, I would freak out thinking she was having a seizure in her sleep (Mom and J had them) all we had to do was change her formula and she was great. I hope it’s something simple with Delilah.

She has been doing so good I’m just scared she’s declining, the nurse’s and Dr.Martin think I’m crazy cause I get scared from everything going on with her but though them it’s nothing since they see worse and she shouldn’t really be where she is for her size and age. She’s an amazing little that’s for sure.

Oh one fun thing I have been dealing with since Rick has been back to work is Aria’s fits! There a blast I think they’re worse for one simple reason, I put up with them Rick never did. She throws a fit when I give her food, no matter what it is she screams and cry’s no no no nonooooo but I learned something today and it might be kind of mean. Put her butt in the high chair with the food and walk away, not out of the house or anything but ill do dishes, fold laundry you know just go about my business and not really pay attention and she stopped and ate her food. TADA I can be taught hahah!

So today Delilah weight 810 grams, 1.13lbs YAY! The echo came back clear, so no more blood clot double YAY, they changed her feedings to 10ml for an hour then off for 2 hours to hopefully give her enough time to digest her food. So far they believe the infection is just a staff infection, and the antibiotics she’s on will do the job.

So prayers this infection goes away fast and stays gone, and that it doesn’t set her back in feeding’s or weight gain.

Hugs and love

Tough cookie

I got a call from the NICU and whenever that happens you hold your breath and try and figure out the tone in their voice. They found out Delilah has another infection, but we're not sure what it is yet they have to wait for the culture to finish growing to k now what it is. They are treating her with antibiotics and will change them once they know for sure what she has.

Delilah now weighs 760-grams, that's 1.11lbs thay had to up her to 2 liters of oxygen casue she keeps having "events" which means she has trouble breathing. she is still at 5ml feedings every hour. so other then the infection she is doing great, and dosent even act as if she's sick.

I have a tough little cookie :)

Hugs and love!

Giggles and monkey noise's

I wish I were better at punctuation and spelling but thank goodness for spell check right? Lol I also wish I could type without looking at the keys, I know I can but it takes so dang long and I make so many mistakes, I just get sick of going through and fixing them =) plus when I try and type with a 2year old on my lap I’m really looking at the keys to make sure her little fingers are not typing away with me, cause well that’s what Aria does.

I know I don’t talk much about Aria on this blog cause when I first started it; it was about Delilah my newest micro preemie. But Aria was also (or should I say is) a micro preemie; she was born at 30 weeks weighing 1lbs 15.3 oz and was 13in long. She is now 23 months old, well June 13^th she’ll be 23 months. I can’t believe July 13^th she will be turning 2!

Aria July 13th 2009 this is when she was born.

When Aria was born we were very blessed with no problem for her other then feedings. She was in the NICU for 6 weeks and just need the feeding tube for a little while. She was small for her age and still is lol I find it very amusing she wears 12-month cloths at 23 months when I have friends with 6month old kids bigger haha.

Today was a rough day for Aria and I, not only has she had to get use to when I was in the hospital now she is getting use to Rick working and for the last 2years it has been the 2 of them home while I worked or went to school. Plus she’s teething I feel so bad for the little chick I wish she could tell me where it hurts but I think she’s confused. And as I type this she is in her bed saying HI, giggling and making monkey noises at her mobile light on the ceiling it’s to freaking cute. She is so annoyed with her teeth she didn’t even want to play outside today =(

Aria loves looking at pictures of her sister Delilah she knows she’s a big sister and will kiss the pictures of Delilah and hug her through the phone =) I tell Aria all the time Delilah looks just like her just darker hair, but Delilah’s hair has started to change color a little it looked blonde to Rick and red to me so we shall see.

When I called to check on Delilah today she weighed in at 740grams! That’s 1.10lbs woot woot she’s moving up on the scale! Her feedings were at 4.5ml every hour and at 3am they will be changing it to 5ml’s every hour. They had to put her back up to 30% oxygen at 1liter instead of 25%, which is fine I can handle that =) she is getting an echo to make sure the blood clot in her heart s smooth or gone away. She is doing great and I can’t wait to go see her tomorrow and give her lots of love!

But for now I should go see what my crazy hyper moody Aria is doing and why she isn’t going to sleep. Wish me luck hahaha!

Hugs and love

Aria playing with water! She is 23 months old in this picture.

Sassy pants

Delilah is little miss.sassy pants today lol, she was throwing fits for her nurse every time she went into her "condo" (isolate) to do anything today. She just wanted to be feed and left alone, I was just told she would hit and scream at Kelly (our nurse today).

Delilah is currently weighing 720 grams 1.9lbs, at 3am they are increasing her feeds to 4ml and taking her off the fats and she is currently at 25% oxygen at 1liter.

I know alot of this stuff sounds foreign to everybody reading it and it's hard to understand, i mean hell this is my 2nd time going through having a preemie and i dont get it all the time. I'm sorry I don't know how to explain it better but I'm not medically smart lol I tell my nurses to dumb it down and I don't write anything down and I really should hahaha I always think i"ll remember everything I'm told but those who know me, know i forget where i put my phone when I'm holding it.

I have a few people ask if they can buy cloths for Delilah yet and I have to be very very honest with everybody and thank those who have been super patient. The reason we told people not to buy anything at first was we were super scared she wasn't going to make it. She was born very very sick and super tiny, we had some very scary calls that I toned down on here I don't have this blog to scare people or make them feel bad for us and our situation I have this so people know whats going on with Delilah and I don't have to remember everything 100 times. We are still telling people to hold off on buying cloths since we don't know how big she will be when she comes home, or what size she'll be for what season. If you have hand me downs you want to get rid of ill gladly take those, I just want people to spend a ton of money (well not yet anyways lol).

Another great thing that has happened for us Rick is working :) He is helping a friend of his doing exterminating stuff, his friend needs all your prayers he recently had a stroke and has had a few set backs so please pray for him, also please keep praying for Delilahs friend Cheyanne and her lungs.

I truly pray none of you reading this ever has to go through having a preemie baby (some of you reading already have) it is a very tough road but as long as you  are patient and listen to your Dr's, nurses, pray and have a great support system then you will do fine and if anyone every has to go through this I'm always here for support. It's harder then people think but again as parents we're just along for the ride.

Hugs and love

p.s please pray Delilah keeps gaining weight! It's funny I pray to lose the weight, and pray my kids gain some weight lol

Another picture Dr.Martin took of Delilah with her ring on. remember this is a size 7 women's ring and is that big on my little peanut! but this little girl is doing amazing thing's and will do even greater thing's in life :)

another day

I need to vent a little bit I am very jealous, when I was pregnant alot of my other friends were (and still are) pregnant, well some of them have started having their babies and i am very jealous of them having full term kids. Some of them complaine about not sleeping and fussy baby stuff when all I want is for my little girl to be home with me and weighing alot more. But this is my life, I have very small childern with minds of their own and dont listen when i ground them to their womb.

I'm not trying to complaine it's what it is and sometimes i have to get thing's out so there it is.

Delilah gained 40 grams since ysterday so she weighs 1.8oz now :) she also had to have another blood transfusion today due to how much blood they take from her. She is tolerating her feeds really well so they went up tp 2ml every hours for 5 hours and an hour off.

Dr.Martin took this picture for a fund raiser they were doing for the NICU waiting room, this is Delilah's hand next to a size 7 womens ring.  

Needs to get a little bigger

Delilah is doing wonderful :) She is eating 1.5ml every hour for 5 hours, she is on 24 calorie formula and hopefully they stop trying to high protein formula right now (she doesn't tolerate that kind well at all) They changed her from the high flow cannula to the regular conventional cannula this one has less humidity, and they can go lower then the 1liter of oxygen she is currently getting.

The Dr took out her suture in her back from surgery yesterday, and the hole from the chest tube is looking good. Today was a lot of the same, she is bouncing between 20grams so she's staying right at 1.7lbs.

please say prayers that she keeps doing so good and that she starts gaining weight and tolerates the feedings.